In the dead of night, around 3:25 a.m., a booze-soaked genius in Rapid City, South Dakota decided that was prime time to crawl through a window for a late-night hook-up. The problem was, the intoxicated moron was so far gone he couldn’t tell one house from the next on the 600 block of Saint James Street.
He was apparenlty convinced he was breaking into his “acquaintance’s” place next door…because nothing says “Honey, I’m home! I brought you cheezy double-beef burrito!” like jimmying a window at zero-dark-thirty while hammered, seeking some companionship from that barfly he met a while back.
The homeowner of the wrong house, rudely awakened by all the racket, wasn’t in a particularly romantic mood. As the over-served man wiggled his way in, the resident delivered a single, well-placed shot intended to stop him. Boom— the drunk’s Darwin Award application had been submitted.
The window wiggler suffered a serious, but non-life-threatening new ventilation, got hauled to the hospital, and is now facing charges. The good news for him is chicks dig scars. Because scars are like tats, but with better stories.
Mr. Darwin nearly claimed another victim, but apparently even natural selection sometimes takes a coffee break when fools and drunks are involved.
Pro-tip for guys looking for late-night hookups: just knock like a normal person. The burritos are optional.
Here’s a teaser from KOTA TV.
A resident shot a home intruder early Saturday morning. Authorities say the man tried to break into a residence in the 600 block of Saint James Street.
Police responded to the home at around 3:25 a.m. after reports of a shooting. When officers arrived, they found a man with a single gunshot wound. He was transported to a local hospital, where he received treatment for serious but non-life-threatening injuries…
Police said the case appears to involve justified home defense, with criminal charges against the intruder pending. The investigation is ongoing.