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Anti-Gun Meme News: Move Over Ghost Guns, Here Come Zombies Guns

This is not what gun controllers mean by “zombie guns.” (courtesy epicgames.com)

While it’s commonly (and rightly) said that the left can’t meme, sometimes they manage to come up with something catchy that at least resonates with the anti-gun crowd. But, even people with the lowest capacity for critical thinking will get tired of something once it gets to be a cliche and hackneyed. When the “loophole” argument started to wear out, the anti-gun movement decided to go with something spookier: ghost guns (or, guns built without a serial number).

But, it’s been a decade since they started trying to frighten people with “untraceable ghost guns.” Just like the “loophole” talking point, that one’s starting to get too many miles on its hoplophobic odometer. It was time to come up with something new and Florida’s Dem Rep. Maxwell Frost is just the kind of authoritarian to do it.

No, they’re not claiming that guns rise from your safe, crawl out onto the streets in search of brains to eat. That’d be dumb and wouldn’t frighten impressionable low information types nearly enough because they don’t have much that kind of zombie would want anyway.

No, what Frost and his accomplices are after here is parts kits from destroyed guns.

In short, when guns collected in a gun “buyback” event or seized crime guns are given to a company for destruction, the company often destroys only the receiver, but strips out all of the other useful parts. These parts kits are then very useful for people building their own guns at home from 80% receiver kits, 3D-printed lowers or frames, etc.

In the end you may get an “untraceable ghost gun,” depending on the frame the builder uses, but these are far more frightening because they’re guns using parts that anti-gunners thought was dead and buried. But no! At least some of them are alive again and ready to create the rivers of blood in the streets that they always warn us about.

Screaming GIFs | GIFDB.com

So, using their infinite reservoirs of creativity, anti-gunners like Rep Frost (no doubt with help from some of the Gun Control Industry’s best marketing minds) are now calling for a law to close the…wait for it…Zombie gun loophole.

The idea would be that when a company gets guns from a police department or other entity to destroy, the have to destroy all of it. Only one problem. These companies currently do the job for free because they make their money from the parts they later sell. If they’re forced to destroy the guns completely, they’ll have to start charing police and cities for their services.

But never mind that for now. The anti-gun left has a meme to propagate. While that will probably resonate with the gun-grabbers, we know that the Rep. Frost isn’t exactly a meme master. In fact, he tried to take on pros at FPC and is getting endlessly owned . . .

Don’t be surprised if the next bill Rep Frost authors is for common sense meme control to prevent people like himself from taking Ls, getting ratioed, and otherwise making conspicuous fools of themselves in public.

After ‘zombie guns’ what’s next?

Now that we’ve run through “ghost guns” and they’ve dropped “zombie guns” on us, I’m guessing that the geniuses in Gun Control Industry market departments are hard at work trying to come up with still more frightening monikers for their flying monkeys to use when this one inevitably ages out. Here are a few likely candidates . . .

Werewolf Guns: Guns that start out normal, but become more dangerous over time. To close the “werewolf gun loophole,” we’ll need to ban all firearm accessories and gunsmithing.

Frankenguns: Guns built from the parts of multiple guns. Closing the “zombie gun” loophole can help prevent this, but the electricity required for electrochemical barrel machining means that even the FGC-9 qualifies as a Frankengun.

Swamp Man Guns: Guns buried in a cache tubes in the southern United States. To stop this menace, we’ll have to to ban PVC pipe unless someone fills out a 4473 and undergoes a background check. Yes, it will inconvenience the plumbing industry, but if it save just one child . . . .

Mummy Guns: Just like a swamp man gun, but in the southwest.

Ice Man Guns: Like a swamp man gun or a mummy gun, but in the mountains or Colorado or some other northern state. Alaska, too.

Kappa Guns: Named for the Japanese swamp man. I’m not sure what this one really does, but Kappa like cucumbers and sumo wrestling. Don’t assume they’re nice because they’ll pull your organs and maybe even your soul out through your rectum given the opportunity. I’ll let the gun control people (they’re paid by billionaires, after all) develop this one more, but there’s some real potential here because that honestly sounds pretty terrifying.

殭屍槍 (aka 僵尸枪 or Jiāngshī qiāng): A zombie gun, but worse because it sucks your life essence (qi) right out of you. To stop this threat, we need to make sure no one imports Norinco parts or anything else firearm-related from China.

Alien Guns: Guns built using parts from UFOs, UAPs, or whatever we’re calling them these days. I actually want to do this, but the Men in Black keep all the really cool stuff whenever it crashes around here.

Vampire Guns: Guns firing reloaded ammo with bullets cast from scavenged lead. See also: Zombie Ammo. All reloading must be outlawed to stop this threat.

Roko’s Basilisk Guns: With the advance of technology, guns may actually become sentient someday, and anyone who refuses to contribute to their development will probably be tortured in AI simulations at some point. Therefore we must ban all use of AI in firearms development.

What mythical creatures do you think they should use? Tell us all about it in the comments or on social media.

4 Responses

  1. “Today, I introduced the Destroy Zombie Guns Act, which closes the Zombie Gun Loophole by requiring those who destroy guns to destroy the whole gun, not just one part.”

    The part they are destroying *is* legally the gun.

    Salvaging parts is no different than people carrying organ donor cards so others may benefit from them. If anything, the most prudent choice would be for seized guns to be sold at auction, to FFLs who would then sell them with a background check.

    Isn’t that what they say they want, guns to be sold with a background check? Wholesaling them does just that…

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